Marital Affair, part 1: Law of Attraction Perspective

by M
(Philadelphia, PA)

Question: What has led me to have a marital affair, and what is the best way to create a situation to remove myself from it without hurting anyone in the process?

Real Life LoA Answer: Ohh, this is a tough (and big) question, but I will do my best to share the Law of Attraction perspective on extra-marital affairs and infidelity. It's SO big, that I'm going to answer it in three pages: This page will cover the general Law of Attraction perspective on having a marital affair. Page 2 will cover the first half of the question, the "what led me to having a marital affair" part, and page 3 will cover the "what to do about it" part of the question. There are links to the other two parts below.

**NOTE** This is going to seem controversial to some readers, so I want to tell you in advance that this answer is not a moral discussion, or a matter of personal opinion – ALL beings are worthy of compassion and love, and ALL of us are doing the best we can. Each and every person is the creator of their own reality, and no one, I repeat, no one can accurately forecast the thousands of vibrations, on the part of the multiple people involved, to say why a situation happened, what higher good that situation is fulfilling for the people involved, or what the "truth" of the vortex is for any of them! That being said, please try to read with an open mind and imagine alignment with Source Energy as the ultimate goal, and guidance, for anyone you may know in this kind of a situation.

"You cannot shame, influence, or advise someone into the vortex."
~Abraham, Panama Canal Cruise, March 18, 2011

The first thing you must remember is that you are a precious, divine, extraordinary and valuable being, regardless of anything you have done, or mistakes you may feel you've made. You are beautiful, worthy, lovable, remarkable, wonderful, magnificent and deserving of all the good you have ever dreamed of, and it is all waiting for you as you expand yourself into your own vortex too!

People do things that they, themselves, do not approve of themselves for doing, when they are in pain and feeling disempowered, trapped, stuck, or powerless. From this 'state of mind' taking action and doing something, anything, can often feel very empowering, even if it is against the law or against one's own moral judgment, because it is higher on the emotional scale than disempowerment. But, a problem arises because you cannot take such a tiny step up the emotional hierarchy of feelings and stay there, and then continue to feel good. And, if the actions you are taking are something that later cause you to feel shame, you then go right back down the emotional scale, because shame is even lower (for your own energy field and alignment with Source Energy) than disempowerment. (Not to mention the physical world consequences that may arise.)

It has to be said that from a purely Law of Attraction perspective, there is nothing wrong with having a marital affair. That is not to say that society does not have a problem with it, or that the people involved will not, or should not be hurt by it, because that is not realistic either. We humans are physical beings, with human emotions, and when we are focused in such a way that we are not aligned with pure love (the way the Universe and Source Energy sees everything,) we respond with hurt feelings and negative emotions. And, when something happens that rocks your world and shakes your faith, it is very difficult to remain aligned with the energy of pure love (at least for most of us.) The truth is that everything that happens to you is always, ultimately, going to be a blessing (or at least, a blessing in disguise.) ...But that can be very difficult to see/feel in the moment of broken promises or if grieving a perceived loss.

From the Law of Attraction perspective, we would all be much better off if we did not try to make each other behave (expect each other to behave) in certain ways in order to be joyful. The only real choice that any of us ever have, is to choose how YOU are going to feel. That is where the power is – choosing the JOY of feeling good anyway – no matter what anyone else does. The choice to feel good anyway can only be made by an individual, so the circumstances that influence the feelings are irrelevant. (The ONLY person stopping you from being able to feel good anyway is you.)

All beings want freedom to follow their own hearts and express their co-creative abilities. The events that are the result of these explorations are the culmination of ALL the vibrations of ALL the people involved – everybody involved (in any way) is a part of the dynamics that created to the situation experienced. And, you learn as you go, that is the only way to do it, and it is the only way to expand. Expansion is the ultimate goal of the Universe and everyone in it, so all situations are good (from the Law of Attraction perspective.)

It's important to remember though, especially while listening to the video below, that this is from the perspective of the person who had been cheated on, the person whose spouse had been unfaithful. As you listen to it, and are moved by the reframing back toward the energy of love that the questioner is experiencing, you must not then expect, or want, your spouse to be the one who changes how they view the situation, or to suddenly understand it in this way. ...The only person you can ever influence to think differently is you (no matter how much somebody else might "benefit" from changing their opinion!) Still, this video illuminates the Law of Attraction perspective on marital affairs very well:

Every relationship, whether it is temporary, a marriage, short-term, long-term, a "one-nighter" or even "just friends" serves to help you to identify the qualities you want to be experiencing in your dream relationship – more of this quality, less of that one, and the ability to love fully regardless of the conditions. That is what relationships do for us, and for our partners. Every relationship experience you have, both good and bad, helps to construct a version of the ideal relationship partner for you enjoy life and expand with, and when one relationship moves out of your life (for whatever reason) it is always for you to be able to move toward the one that is already created in your vortex. Sometimes that transformation is with the partner you already have, and sometimes it is not. But there is not right or wrong either way, from the Law of Attraction perspective.

The answer is continued in part 2...

Link to part 2: Marital Affair, How Did I Get Here?

Link to part 3: Marital Affair, What Do I Do Now?

Comments for Marital Affair, part 1: Law of Attraction Perspective

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May 22, 2011
Re Marital Affair
by: LOABlog

Its a shame that it has gone this far and reached the stage of an affair.
I feel that the person should have used the Law of Attraction to put right what was wrong in the relationship when they first found they were not happy and perhaps a lot of hurt could have been avoided.
The Person must also be true to themselves and not stay in a relationship if they are not happy.

May 23, 2011
Excellent point
by: Andrea, RLLoA moderator

Thank you for writing, you make a good point, especially for those readers who may be teetering on the edge, or flirting with the idea of having an affair before it has started.

It is true - changing one's point of focus, channeling attention onto the positive aspects of their partner, taking responsibility for their own inner happiness, and finding joy within oneself (prior to turning to another person to try to find it) are all powerful ways to work in harmony with the Law of Attraction to fix a relationship before it goes sour.

It's not possible to change the events of something that has already happened, but thank you for bringing forward this important perspective all the same. Thank you!

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