No Love Lost... What To Do
When Annoying People Get You Down
So what ARE you supposed to do when there is no love lost between you and that person I’m trying to tell you to think of positive aspects about?
Or when a few annoying people in your vicinity are just too darned irritating to think of anything positive about?!
…When there is bad blood, scorn, blaming, resentment, a grudge, or if they are just plain old “hard to love”?
I have certainly crossed paths with plenty of difficult people who got on my nerves, so I know how challenging it can be to try to turn that feeling on it’s ear to focus on good things about them – especially when there is no love lost between you! And, even if you can come up with something positive, it’s going to be pretty shallow, and it doesn’t seem to do anything to make you feel better…
The problem is that holding a grudge, and carrying around resentment or blame only really hurts you!
...It’s like holding poison in your own mouth with the intent to spit it at the object of your scorn, but then never running into them while the poison slowly seeps into YOUR system!
Also, while you are focused on the animosity (holding on to the "no love lost" poison) you are NOT focused on the kinds of things that will increase your ability to attract all the GOOD things you want for YOUR life!
Your feelings are perfectly legitimate, but the Law of Attraction is also continuously magnetizing more and more and more of whatever kind of experiences you are holding in your attention most of the time.
...If you are focused on scorn, the "no love lost" sentiment, or the bad blood that has passed, you are poisoning your own manifestations. Law of Attraction will elicit experiences and feelings that are in harmony with the feeling you have most of the time throughout the day… It may seem unfair, but that is how it works.
The only thing to do is to try to find a way to clean it up in YOUR mind – not for them, but for YOU!
A good friend of mine (and fellow Law of Attraction coach), Theresa Tetley, recently shared this idea she came up with for what to do when someone is just too annoying to think of positive aspects about (at least for the moment!)
Instead of trying to come up with good qualities about the other person, she makes a list of what that person might be able to use in order to become happy!
...It’s a great idea – when you think about it, people who are irritating, are usually in a great deal of pain themselves. They are most likely totally stressed out, under a lot of pressure, and extremely unfulfilled or unhappy – that is why they aren’t so pleasant to be around.
(...And that is WHY there is no love lost on them!) On the other hand, genuinely happy people tend to be more naturally pleasant and easy to be around (…when you can find them!)
If you could think in terms of what kinds of things, situations, gifts, qualities or experiences could transform someone who is "hard to love" into someone who is happier, you can START to imagine what they MIGHT be like if they weren't having such a tough time right now...
Give it a try; write a list of at least 10 things that might make them truly happy:
- What kind of job or career might be truly fulfilling for them?
- Are they in a happy relationship? Would they secretly (or not so secretly) like to be? What kind of relationship would make them feel loved?
- How about health, body, physique and general happiness with themselves? What do you know they WISHED they looked like or felt like?
- Do they need money? Is life hard right now? What would turn that around for them?
- What kind of clothes would they love to be wearing? What kind of car would they dream of driving? What kind of activities do they wish they were doing? What kind of luxuries might they dream of being able to afford or do guilt-free?
- Do they crave freedom, travel or adventure? What kind? How often?
- What about family or children – are things good in that area? What kind of dreams do they harbor in that regard?
- What would make them happy?
- What do they wish / dream they could be?
This is NOT something you should share with them, they most likely won’t take it well – it’s one thing to want good things for someone, but if they were to know it’s because you think they are being a jerk without it, they won’t see it as a compliment... (And, believe it or not, they probably do not feel the same "no love lost" feeling that you do anyway! Really.)
This is ESPECIALLY true if the person in question is actually a good friend, someone very close to you, or someone you interact with everyday. Everyone can grate on our nerves once in a while. And, sometimes, the consequences are even worse for you in those cases, because you can also tend to feel a level of guilt for not being able to see that person in a good light – even MORE reason to clean it up!
Cleaning up the "no love lost" energy and neutralizing it has WAY more benefits for you than it does for them – the ONLY real point of this exercise is to get YOUR mind thinking in a new direction... When you do, you can expect these benefits:
- When you take time to imagine and visualize good things happening for anyone, it is as good as if you were imagining it for yourself – even better actually! Because when you are vividly imagining it for someone else, YOU are still the one imagining it (where the power is) but without the resistance of simultaneously reminding yourself that it is not real for you yet, because it’s not supposed to be!
- As your feelings start to ease up about the other person, you will be more able to feel at peace inside your own heart when you hear their name, think of them, or even when you are interacting with them again. …When YOU feel a sense of peace and contentment in your heart, THAT is when the Law of Attraction is magnetizing the good things YOU desire.
- The only reason most of us ever really want anything is because we hope that it will make us feel good, or at least feel better. When we start thinking in terms of what kind of things will make someone else feel better, YOU are attracting things that will make YOU feel better. When you are thinking about and attracting that which will make you feel better, the natural result is that YOU feel good!
- Relationships are complicated in the real world – the more ways we can find to see others with kind eyes and a peaceful heart, the more in alignment we are with Source Energy. Source Energy is pure love, and it is aligning ourselves with that vibration that attracts all the good we desire… THAT is why we try to find positive aspects!
Finding the positive aspects of people and life around us is the single best Law of Attraction and manifestation tool there is – especially when there had been that no love lost feeling prior – the bigger the obstacle the bigger the reward when it is overcome! Go find those positive aspects and YOU are the one who will feel good for it!
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