Law of Attraction Q & A:
Why Do Negative People Surround Me?

Question: I seem to attract a lot of negative people into my life -- I have the understanding that situations that do arise are of our own creation (since everything is our creation), correct? But, we have created those situations to do what? To show us areas of resistance (?) within ourselves?

Does that mean we are projecting these things, e.g. if we are surrounded by negative people, does that mean we are primarily negative? Again for example: for some unknown reason I am surrounded by fairly negative people, although most people would say that I am extremely positive. And when I'm speaking with them, I always try to find the next best thought for them, or something positive for them to concentrate on. But does this mean that somewhere in the deepest darkest recesses of my Id [refers to: Id/Ego/Superego - a Jungian psychological construct for the deep Inner Self], I am harbouring dark and dreary thoughts?


Answer: I can really relate to your question - thank you for asking it! I myself have often wondered what it means when I seem to have a pattern of attraction (that I don't much like) going on, and wonder HOW (or why) I am attracting it!

Though what you attract can indicate thoughts and beliefs which are buried in the recesses of your soul, there is a much simpler way to work with, learn from, and expand through what you are experiencing than digging up all that old stuff.

It involves noticing what you are attracting, and then adjusting and fine-tuning your ideas and feelings ABOUT the subject to reflect more of what you DO want to experience (and why) rather than frustration with its' opposite...

We are attracting everything we experience through the Law of Attraction, but it is not "designed" by some higher power to "show" or teach us anything... It is a much more simple cause and effect relationship.

If you are focused on the overall subject of being positive (or negative), you will attract others who are examples of it (either in the positive OR the negative) - you will attract people who want to talk about it, want advice about it, who DO want to be that way, who DON'T want to be that way, who are good examples and who are bad examples...

...Because BEING positive/negative is the overall subject matter of the idea you are thinking about!

When you notice a pattern in yourself by what you are attracting, like attracting negative people, it is almost NEVER so direct as to mean that you, yourself, are a negative person.

(...Or, if that was the reason, you most likely wouldn't notice at all, because the other people wouldn't seem negative in comparison, they would seem normal!)

What we attract is based on what kind of energy we are putting out, and what ABOUT the kind of subjects our attention is focused on - not which version of the subject (positive or negative). The version of the subject is dictated by how you FEEL about the subject!

Therefore, if you are very focused on one extreme end of the "positive-negative" spectrum (being positive yourself), chances are very good that you will attract a lot of people who are the polar opposite of that, because:

  • If "being positive" is an important virtue, then the chances are that its' opposite ("being negative") feels like a vice, and carries the energy of something to be avoided... (Resistance)

  • Resistance / Trying to avoid something (anything) is a very powerful ATTRACTOR... In this case, avoiding both "being negative" oneself, and trying to avoid other people who tend to be negative, will have the effect of attracting those exact tendencies from others

  • Or, when you do have an abundance of a quality, you will also attract people who need/want more of that quality - like moths to a flame - they will sniff you out energetically and flock to you, because you are a generally positive person and you DO help them to feel better!

  • Then the cycle perpetuates itself and continues, because you are thinking ABOUT someone who is feeling negative, you want to do something to fix that, you give attention to that subject and the person feeling that way, then you attract more of that...

The overall net effect is that a "positive person" can attract a lot of negative people because:

  • Being positive is good = attract people who are breaking that "rule" = attract negative people

  • You DO want to attract positive people because you enjoy feeling upbeat and optimistic = attract positive people

  • You DO want to attract positive people because you aren't crazy about negative people = attract negative people

  • You don't want to attract negative people = you always attract what you don't want = attract negative people

  • You are a positive person = you attract people who want to feel less negative = attract negative people

  • You attracted a negative friend = you get more of whatever you are "feeling" ABOUT currently = attract negative people

Whew! Quite the quandary - it can be all-out depressing - especially for a positive person like you or me! But there is hope!! ...and it's actually an easy fix!!

Find the positive aspects of whomever (or whatever) you are attracting, and focus your attention on THAT instead!

...You don't have to share it with the person, just mentally focus your mind to think about what IS good about the person, their dreams, who they are inside, what they want, what they long for, what their tender sweet parts are, how they can be lovable - anything that you can think of that IS positive about them!

List THOSE qualities in your mind every time you think of them or interact with them, and before you know it, they will either move any remnants of their negativity right on along to someone else, or they may even surprise you by suddenly feeling more optimistic themselves!

And, in general, make it a practice to not only focus on what you DO want to attract and experience, but also get in the habit of asking/verifying for yourself WHY you want that - and make sure it is for positive and uplifting reasons!

It is MUCH easier to attract something you DO want because you like how it makes you feel, or because it makes you feel good, as opposed to trying to attract something because you do not like it's opposite.

As we saw in the example above - it is both trying to go around the hard way, and it often backfires!


...I hope this answers your question!!!

Much love and Many Blessings to you,


Andrea












Return to the Top of the Attracting Negative People Q & A Page

Return to the Real Life Law of Attraction Home Page